Space project of Ladonia forming (terra forming) planets with potatoes
propose the Ladonian space-program start Ladonia-forming (popularly called
terra-forming in other
circumstances) the planets Mars and Venus with potatoes.
The project involves using gene-modified potatoes with genes taken from Ladonian seaweed. This will make them much stronger (the potatoes) and a lot more durable. They will work better and transform the planets atmosphere to get a faster development towards the point where the atmosphere accelerates and start working for us instead of against us (as it will do in the beginning due to lack of oxygen). It will also look fantastic with the green crops against the reddish Mars-surface, and thus bringing an artful approach to a space program!
Earth based offspring
seaweed gene modified potato project will also provide an offspring. It
will make it possible to grow lots and lots and lots of potatoes on the
Ladonian stony shore and along the shoreline. They will grow strong
between the stones and boulders and will actually not need much soil. And
from growing in saltwater they will be ready direct after a little cooking.
Presalted potatoes!! This is a revolution in the kitchen. Never again you
have to stretch yourself after the salt or buy salt for your potatoes. And
making crisps will be very easy! Just slice the Ladonian Seaweed-potato
and chuck it in the oven. Et Voila! 200 degrees C. for approximately 10-15
minutes will make excellent salted potato chips!!!
This is of course an excellent export product.
might very well provide us with more than one crop a year, since the
seaweed growth season is so much longer than traditional potato season.
The ministry is occupied in looking into the matter at the moment.
Cheap ground material
project will be possible in a very cheap way as well. Since the potato
doesn’t need oxygen (and actually produces it itself during the flight
to Mars – or any other planet we might want to Ladoniaform). Venus is
the next obvious place to go for example. The seaweed gene potato will
also be very durable to heat exposure during growth cycle.
can get old rockets cheap from ESA, NASA and former USSR. They will
practically give them away. And since long-range missiles are being junked
in heaps we can get those intercontinental ballistic missiles very cheap.
we have to do pre launch is to fill up the rockets with seaweed potatoes,
and a bit of seawater (which come very cheap – in fact free). Account
for the growth so the rocket doesn’t explode from growing potatoes.
Experiment’s in this matter is conducted. After launch all is taken care
off. When approaching the planets (Mars or Venus) atmosphere the rockets
use the atmosphere as a rock skipping over a water surface to slow down
and are programmed to land in a extremely low angel. This way the rocket
will actually work as a plough and force the potatoes into and over the
surface in a safe and agricultural manner.
the right planning of trajectories we could plant the potatoes from space
and not even needing to land. Then we can plant them in formation so we
can actually "write" on the mars-surface. We could create the
Ladonian Weapon with Ladonia and the apple and we would get it in nice
potato-leave-green against the rusty red surface - Very artful.
On the plus side we have the enormous advantage with
Ladonia-forming a whole new planet and expanding the Ladonian
will be ejected from the backside of the rocket. Several metric tons of
water, soil and potato will be spread out with every rocket grounding.
Several amounts of oxygen and other gases will also find its way into the
atmosphere at the same time. Calculations are being carried out over how
many rocket-landings we will need before its time to send colonisation
Agricultural aspects and export possibilities
rockets will be stripped of anything environmental hazardous and all
rocket fuel will be used up during the trip. During the long travel trough
the atmosphere the rocket will be partly incinerated and thoroughly
disinfected. The only thing left will be shattered metal, which will in
fact be part of the landscape over time. It will rust and provide valuable
minerals to the planets surface. We don’t know for sure yet how big
these modified potatoes will grow in the lower gravity-field. The soil is
of course a bit leaner than earth so that might hinder the growth.
last step (when the planets atmosphere starts thickening) would be to send
farm people there to harvest and set up distillery and start to colonize. Ladonian
Space Liquer will be the obvious next export product. The
alcohol created will also work nicely as fuel and for heating on the
planet. Farm people are so much cheaper personnel then for example
astronauts (that one have to admit are used to very high salary and lots
of outrageous perks).
the idea further
field is to plant potatoes directly in space. Under a sealed special
plastic tent that will create a sort of a biosphere and be able to stretch
we might be able to grow enormous size potatoes. If properly [slowly]
exposed to space a big enough potato would develop it's own atmosphere. Of
course that would take a lot bigger potatoes even bigger than Idaho-,
Sweden- or black-earth Russian-ones. It would perhaps take a potato the
size of our moon and that would be able to contain its atmosphere during a
shorter time span (say a couple of million years, which is very short on a
interstellar scale). But this will definitely expand the Ladonian
territories immensely by creating a habitual planet from scratch [potatoes,
shall we produce and export?
could start exporting Ladonian Race Stones. This might only include
smaller rocks and pebbles due to hefty shipping costs. If we export the
pebbles, we in the race commity feel safe that pebbles on steroids also
will be a lesser of a problem in the future among Ladonian Stone Race
starting fields ;)
Day of Artful Jumps
Ministry of Art & Jump would like to propose a day of Jump and Art. We
want to label it "the day of artful jumps" and proposed date is
July 18. That happens to be the exact date the Minister of Art & Jump
officially started the "HopArt Tour" in 2002.
day of artful jumps" is the day when all citizens can (and should)
make jumps for no reason at all, more than just to make it artful, if they
wish. They can also use "the day of artful jumps" to protest
against the order of things or to make a statement of some sort. I think
it's suitable to put the jumpday in the middle of the summer, for
a cheap and effective protection for Ladonia
can use payphones for people to phone in insults against us (Ladonia) and
then putting up loudspeakers in the forest along our borders and let them
play up the insults, thus surrounding Ladonia with a wall of deadly
insults to keep off intruders. This will not cost much since the payphones
will actually get us money in the process.
Ministry also engages in more philosophical questions, like speculations
about future linguistics
people will speak some kind of greater language-groups than we have today.
"The global village" must in effect have an impact on language
in the future. I think they perhaps will speak english-spanish in Europe/america
(south and north) thus making it "Spanglish".
will perhaps speak "frenglish" (french-english) and some "germlish"
(german-english). [One can actually, as we speak, (no pun;) see
indications of such linguistic development in american english already
in asia they will perhaps speak "asian" in a jap-chin-hindu mix
the long run, say in a millenia or so of "global-village-communication"
everybody will speak "earthling". Perhaps a language like
Esperanto will revive and come back in great style?
minor problems like international diplomacy during warfare.
the Iraq war broke lose, a suggestion came from the Secretary of State
that Ladonia could offer Saddam and Bush asylum in Ladonia - since they
would be great tourist attractions. And at the same time steal the oil in
Iraq by digging a tunnel from Ladonia to Iraq. The Minister of Art &
Jump came up with the following scenario and suggestion:
is a very artful way of solving this little diplomatic dilemma. The whole
thing has so far not been very artful and not very erotic. So I say start
shovelling! I have calculated the angle to about 35 degrees (no, I will
tell the truth, I am lying - but I did estimate it very roughly, so it was
just a little lie). Did I say angle? I meant angel, but we need not an
angel but it's counterpart; namely a little devil (not THE Devil, just one
of his minor subjects, (perhaps a lower demon) He Himself is surely very
busy working in Iraq these days). Anyway, the reason for bringing a little
devil is simple. Devils are used to underground work and shovelling.
The angle must be adjusted some times to pretty steep sometimes and less
steep other times – taking into consideration the waters we have to pass
(Baltic Sea and mediterranean-
in particular the latter since it's very deep. And another reason for
bringing a devil or two along for shovelling; when we get to Iraq we could
bring Saddam back trough the tunnel, the devil(s) comes in handy (so we
won't end up with a fake Saddam!) according to the "it takes one to
back in Ladonia we use the newly found oil-money to build a little theme
park with Saddam and Hussein in a cage where they can be swinging baseball
bats, harsh words and perhaps involve in fistfight and such. We can also
let people visit them one-on-one and get some smart advice on how to run a
country, run amok, problem solving, propaganda and also other things like
anger-control, argumentation and conversation technique.